Monthly Archives: May 2015

The Capitals Free Agents: Who to Sign, Who to Cut, and Who to Beg

Posted on May 18, 2015 by

WINE ‘EM DINE ‘EM AND SIGN ‘EM. Braden Holtby  And ye, Jesus did looketh down from the cross and spake thusly: “Lulz yall gonna pay me now.” Braden Holtby, as a southerner fanning himself on the veranda and drinking a mint julep might say, is about to get paiiiiyyyyyyyyyyyydddddddddddddduhhhhh. And … Continue reading →

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Your Game 7 Caps-Rangers Drinking Game

Posted on May 12, 2015 by

IF Joel Ward makes a big play – Drink. IF Joel Ward’s butt makes a big play – Drink, shout “Hump Day!” IF Tom Wilson gets in a fight – Finish your drink, complain about how bad the Pacquiao-Mayweather fight was. IF … Continue reading →

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These Capitals Are Making Me Thirsty!

Posted on May 11, 2015 by

It’s Not How You Start, It’s How You Finish (Unless It Is) The Washington Capitals have a bad habit: they ease into games, to borrow a phrase from the greatest television show of all time, “like an old man into … Continue reading →

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A Capitals Fan Goes to the Doctor

Posted on May 7, 2015 by

DOCTOR: What brings you in today?   YOU: Hi, Doc. I guess I just want to know if it’s normal to feel this way, like if I have reason to be so excited. Have you, now or ever before, experienced sensations … Continue reading →

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A Tale of Two Tough Guys, and the Return of “Liable to Libel”

Posted on May 5, 2015 by

Tom Wilson – Asset, or Ass? Tom Wilson: the most incendiary youngster to hit Washington since William Jefferson Clinton, and bane of the New York zeitgeist. Wilson’s wrecking ball style of play, characterized by the kind of wanton disregard for … Continue reading →

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The Brouwer Play May Be Over, But Holtby is Rangers’ Bigger Worry

Posted on May 3, 2015 by

Souring on Brouwer   The hour for Brouwer on the power play has soured. Once, in the dark old days of an impotent Washington offense bereft of top-six talent, Troy Boy was a consistent bright spot, always to be counted … Continue reading →

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